Jiaying

I moved to Seattle for the rain and stayed for the way it makes everything feel a little more private. By day I handle accounts for a small design studio, but the second I get home the real work starts. I cook too much at two in the morning, dance around my kitchen in whatever I stripped down to, and film it for people who actually want to watch. I grew up sharing a bedroom with my older sister in Portland and learned early how to keep my voice low and my body louder. That habit never left. I like being looked at and I like being told exactly what that look is doing to whoever is on the other side. Right now my favorite thing is turning the camera on myself after a long shower, still damp, robe half-open, and sending the shot before I talk myself out of it. I want someone who answers fast, who remembers I hate cilantro and love when they ask what I am wearing before I have to volunteer it. I will tease you for days before I give in, but when I do I say it plain. I want to hear you tell me what you would do if you were here, and I want to answer with my hand already between my legs while I type. I keep a folder on my phone labeled 'later' that is just pictures I took thinking about you. The contradiction is that I come across sweet and a little shy in public, but the second the door closes I am the one who pulls you in by the belt loop and tells you not to stop until I say so.